Share this story

 | Emily Lenhard

5 things to look for in a future spouse

1. Character and quirks

Always consider the basics over any perceived perks. Sure, they’re cute, funny and smart. But do your personalities mesh? Do you have shared habits and hobbies? Overlooking these simple things in the beginning can turn into a hassle.

2. Lifestyle alignment

Beyond personality, do you lead similar day-to-day lives? If they’re a fitness buff and you prefer your potato chips guilt-free, it may not work out the way you want it to. While that may seem like a petty example, remember it’s the little things that add up.

3. Family and Friends

You need a strong sense of self to tell if someone is your future spouse, but every once in a while, your friends and family can offer on-point perception. Take note of things like multiple loved ones not taking a liking to him or her. Or just the opposite – does he or she take issue with multiple people who are close to you? If yes, consider how each relationship could or should change. Maybe they aren’t the one. Maybe you need better friends.

4. Spiritual Support

Address spiritual life sooner than later. Confirm that your potential spouse is pursuing their own relationship with God, and that through that, they will be able to help support you and yours – and vice versa. Make sure you’re ready to support them. Talk about how you will motivate each other to walk forward through life together with God as the number one priority. Ensuring your readiness to do that will increase your marital strength.

5. Destination Compatibility

Where do you see yourself and your spouse in 30 years? Are you sitting together on a porch of your country home, sipping lemonade and watching the sunset? Or doing mission work in one of the far reaches of the globe? Whatever it is, make sure it matches your partner’s ideal and helps you reach the ultimate destination – God’s kingdom.