Every marriage needs a strong foundation. For Christian and Christine Meert, whose decades-long response to the call of God has been an enthusiastic, joyful yes, it’s only natural to share the bedrock teachings of the Church with couples just starting down the path toward matrimony. Now, as the online program they founded, Agapè Catholic Ministries, celebrates 20 years of marriage preparation — and the 65,000-plus couples they’ve helped in three different countries — Christian looks back with gratitude for the many graces that have helped their work grow along the way.

“We are both French, and both lifelong Catholics,” Christian clarifies. “We’ve been married since 1977 and have five children together. Each of us had powerful conversion experiences and in 1990, our family sold the house, gave it to the poor, and joined a lay community, the Community of the Beatitudes. 

“We were asked to establish the community’s first house in Denver, which we eagerly did. So we arrive, drop our suitcases on the parking lot, and we say, ‘Lord, here we are.’ And Archbishop Chaput asked us to do something for families, and that’s how it started, the marriage prep.”

Christian says he and his wife were familiar with the Theology of the Body, so, “We started to teach marriage prep based on that and on other teachings of the Catholic Church. We don’t want to put in our own thoughts or suggestions or anything. Just the teachings of the Church.”

But the early days weren’t easy. 

“Our first class was really kind of a lecture. And it was nice, but I didn’t feel happy. I wasn’t comfortable,” he remembers. “Right afterward, we had a conference with our youngest daughter’s kindergarten teacher, and I told her of my concerns. She stepped in to support us, helping us develop a way of teaching known as the heuristic method. Suddenly, our work became very personal. I call it “the Jesus method,” because it’s the same way Jesus taught, by asking questions that help people find the truth.

“The whole program is focused on the couple. They really must look inward and express their thoughts—in writing—to their future spouse. We keep going deeper and deeper, and participants come to know themselves, one another and God more fully.”

While the program was initially in person, facilitated by Christine and Christian directly, a new opportunity presented itself when a couple from a remote area of Colorado needed to prepare for marriage but were too far from any organized place to do so.

“So we say, ‘Well, maybe we do it like a correspondence class, but by email, via the internet, and so it would be faster.’ And we started, we asked the questions, and the first couples we had, we were so surprised. It was awesome because the couple was very open. They would write really what they had inside, because it felt safe and natural to do so via the internet.”

Soon, God brought them an expert web developer who would help them grow their program exponentially. They launched AgapeCatholicMinistries.info together in May 2004. 

But rather than succumb to online teaching videos, the Meerts continued to rely on the written word as a central means of communication and teaching.

“It’s work. Our program is very deep, very spiritual, and it’s work,” Christian says. “We take care to place couples with the best possible mentors, who will work with them for up to three months. And if they need more, we give them more.”

Here in the Diocese of Lansing, many couples have benefited from the program, including John Arthur, 25, and Katherine Dzialowski, 24, who attend Holy Spirit Parish in Brighton. Engaged for more than a year now, they plan to wed on March 29th, 2025, in the parish they call home.

Katherine, who works as a youth substance use prevention specialist, says the Agapè marriage prep program has been powerful.

“There was a lot of stuff that was really eye-opening,” she says. “It was very beneficial for both of us, and our communication has improved a lot since then. Every day we continue to learn how to be there for each other in different ways and we are very grateful for the course.”

John agrees. “It really allowed us to pinpoint and focus on communication, for sure. I work in construction, so I was waking up at 4 a.m. and not returning until 7 or 8 p.m., so we would do a couple of hours in the evening. I’m grateful; it’s really allowed us to dive into our faith together.”

Why the work matters

According to the Center for Applied Research in the Apostolate, marriages in the Catholic Church declined by 70 percent between 1970 and 2020. Prayer, programming, and proper catechesis among young couples are essential to be sure the sacrament of matrimony is strengthened.

As the Meerts and their team continue to measure results, they have noted surprising results:

August 2024 program evaluations showed an overwhelming 98.5 percent positive feedback.

Among August Agapè participants, 81 percent of couples are choosing abstinence before marriage, while more than 17 percent are considering it. Only 1.74 percent have rejected the concept.

In this same group, nearly 75 percent say they are now more open to Natural Family Planning.