Envious?
6 ways to stop being jealous of co-workers

I have a friend who had a good job that offered the opportunity for lots of overtime. He was a dedicated employee, yet struck a good balance between his work and personal time. While many of his co-workers needed overtime to make payments on expensive vehicles, toys or homes, my friend and his wife were content with a more modest but comfortable lifestyle, which allowed him to turn down many overtime hours in order to attend Boy Scout activities. He found more fulfillment in serving as a Scout leader than he did in keeping up with his co-workers.

The catechism teaches us that envy comes from pride; the baptized person should train himself or herself to live in humility (CC 2540). What does it mean to live in humility? I think my friend is a good example – here’s what I learned from him:

1 Stop measuring my value according to the material standards of others.
2 Search out and be open to the purpose to which God is calling me.
3 My gifts and talents are meant to serve others, not to glorify myself.
4 Trust my sense of purpose. Decisions in my life should be directly aligned with the pursuit of that purpose, not simply material gain.
5 Energy and joy come from serving others, and that’s contagious.
6 Rejoice in the merits and success of others.

Regrettably, pride catches up with all of us at times and we wonder why someone else has a better job, makes more money or has more than we do. We then do whatever is necessary to advance in our jobs so we can accumulate what others have; convinced we will then be happy. But the catechism teaches that envy is “sadness at the sight of another’s goods and the immoderate desire to acquire them ... envy represents ... a refusal of charity.” (CCC 2539, 2540) In other words, as long as we are motivated primarily by pursuing what others have, we will never be happy. Instead, we must heed Mother Teresa’s lesson that peace comes from using our gifts to serve others.

My friend is a living example of someone who found contentment in sharing his gifts rather than in chasing material success because of envy. He seeks God’s kingdom first, trusting he will receive what he needs. (Matt 6:32-33) By the way – he was able to retire at the ripe old age of 48.

Originally Published: December 2004